z’s bubbles 2

And in one swell move, there is no more evening freedom.

But let’s step back for just a minute. Once again Ruth has proven over the past few days that I married WAY out of my league. So now we have a system to put Cora back to sleep. And it’s all thanks to her (Ruth, that is). The downside though is called: a schedule. Which means that from about 5 to 8pm, she’s stuck taking care care of the children, pretty much every minute. When I come home between 7 and 7:45, I’ll help her, but she’ll have to cary most of the burden, most of the time.

And then after 8 it’s lights out. And since the house is so small, that means for all of us. And with Cora doing sleep/wake/sleep thing for 2 hours of the past 3 days (from 8pm to 10-11ish), it also means that once the kids are in bed, there will be no reading, no cleaning, no movies, no nothing unless one wants to risk reducing the number of sleeping hours to dangerously low numbers…

I guess we should stock up on vitamins, snack bars and energy drinks again.

Now where was that picture of supermom Ruth was playing with… I should make a superdad to go with her.

Yes. It is still one of my major challenges, if not the biggest one I have: procrastination.

After all, skipping family planning, desk cleaning, account balancing is ever so easy… and one doesn’t even have to acknowledge the blatantly obvious lack of time and money that would have to be faced if those activities were indeed to be held… regularly.

And if they were to be faced they might actually… (heaven forbid) … be solved at some point!

Though come to think of it, planning would make a lot of difference in our lives. Maybe we’ll need to hold a family council on it. We definately should bring that up in the next family planning session… But not until tomorrow

I can’t believe it. It’s Gillian’s first day of kindergarten. But she’s just my baby, she can’t go to school yet!

Though she was dreadfully adorable this morning. Roo got her out of bed and she appearantly asked where I was and Roo told her I was making waffles in the kitchen and the next thing I know there’s a pink flash of lightning going through the kitch and wrapping itself around my leg. I guess she liked the thought of waffles.

So Ruth got everyone dressed while I packed lunch and the car and we made it there just a few minutes before 8. One of the teachers was being funny saying she had never seen the kids so excited to go to school. Gillian sure was excited. And we were the first ones headed towards her classroom. Though her and one of her school mates were almost racing down the hallway It was cute.

Now my big girl is in school. She didn’t even say goodbye she was so happy to be there…

Maybe I’ll post pics later…

I have this habit of keeping a daunting, incredibly long to-do list. Part of it is locked away in my head, some of it is written down. All of it is constantly held up to my inner eye while I lecture myself on how I need to get all this done. In the end, nothing gets done because I don’t know where to start, and it would appear to be harded to start climbing a mountain if you’re standing in front of a 200 ft vertical cliff…

That, combined with the usual feelings of inadequacy, and the frustration I put Ruth through by abandonning her to the claws of three little cuties for extended amounts of time, managed to overshadow the rather happy moments we had this week:

1. Cora is growing, putting weight on her legs and incredibly alert. Not to mention very cuddly

2. Liam is talking up a storm, making sentences that are more than 3 or 4 words and saying please!

3. It was Gillian’s last day of Tumble Bugs Preschool today and she absolutely can’t wait to get into kindergarten.

4. Ruth has been very sweet and inventive in finding ways to cope with the situation of having 3 children and having to be locked inside the house because there really is nowhere to go and it’s over 100 degrees outside.

And then yesterday, I was reviewing my LJ profile and noticed they added schools to the information one can provide on oneself (shows you how often I look at a uaser’s profile!). So I added mine. Or at least tried to as two weren’t listed yet… But in the process, I also sumbled on a French site to find old classmates. And I did find a few that I remembered going to school with. But the site (and all others that I could find) wanted to charge a 1-year $20 subscription to let me email them. That’s a lot of money for 6 people who may not remember me and who’s information on that site might be completely outdated… So I sent them a “free hello”. I don’t have very high hopes of ever hearing something back… Though it was interesting some of the people had their career paths after high-school listed and it was rather different than expected for some.

Though while in filling out my profile, this one question at the end stumped me. It read “Rate your satisfaction with your life” and gave you three choices: a) “I achieved all my childhood dreams”, b) “I’m somewhat satisfied with where I’ve gone with my life” or c) “I’m completely unhappy with the choices I’ve made”. Oh that’s hard to face. And as much as I’d like to answer a), there’s just no way and even in contemplating b) there are so many things that (and this is going to sound silly) I wish I would do different…

So that whole experience left me somewhat puzzled feeling. And then my parents called saying my dad was going to leave the next day. So we went over there to show him Cora and have dinner with them. To cut a long story short it went ok, except for when my dad said that he felt there was an obstacle between the two of us and that if I ever wanted to talk about it, I would be welcome to. OK. But of course he couldn’t say it just like that. No. He had to add that I should do that if I value the father-son relationship at all. Waitasecond… that sounds like a guilt trip to me. And what happened to the part that he wanted to talk about it too? It’s a frigging two way street. If I want someone to really REALLY talk to me, I try to get in touch with them as often as possible. If I can’t call them, I’ll email them. You bug someone often enough, they’ll listen to you. Heck they even might give you a job!

So I guess sometime this week, I’ll put together something to tell him again why it is I don’t want to spend time with him. He should listen to his wife and emulate her behaviour. Yes, there are a great many things mom and I disagree on, and a lot of subjects we wont even go near because of that. But she is trying to build somewhat of a relationship, making deposits where she can. He is not.

I’m not sure he knows how or that he will ever take the time to try.